Friday, February 12, 2010

roots and wings...

How does that saying go...? "as parents we give our children two things... one is roots, the other is wings..."

The other morning after Emily and I had dropped off Julianna and were on the way to Emily's school, we started spotting and counting bald eagles. It was easy to see them here and there in the trees... not a cloud in the sky. I headed a little farther out into the country to a friends house and saw a few more, still counting. Picking up Emily after school brought one more into view, and she told me she'd seen three at lunch time. We headed back towards Julianna's school to watch her basketball game, still counting, and by the time we got there, our total for the day was at 25.

Why so many eagles? Maybe because it's been so Spring-like for so long, the birds are a little confused as to the season. Maybe we didn't actually see 25... very likely it could have been the same ones busy in their nests, staying close to home, preparing for their young ones, giving them roots. Either way, I was astounded to see so many.

Parenting has been a little rough for us lately. I've come to the realization that some of the characteristics I'm seeing growing in one of my girls just might stick around for the next few years, and it's worrying me because they're not what I hope for her. Last night I explained to her that when I babysit her one year old cousin, I've learned to stay one step ahead of him so when he heads for trouble, I can head him off. If I don't, I know he could get hurt or his reaction will be tears when I tell him 'no'. Telling my daughter that I don't always know how to ward off her negative reactions was difficult. But it felt right to be totally honest with her, because so often lately, her reactions are difficult for me to deal with. I've never parented before and each day is one of a kind.

Robyn and I are knee deep in roots right now and were praying that the things we do in raising our girls will really take hold so that when the time comes, our girls can really take flight.

Thanks for listening. I'm not seeking advice, but I did really need to share.


Christine said...

I can really identify with you on this. Parenting is as unique to us as our children are each unique. That's all we can do - pray for wisdom and guidance to train them up in the right way.
Blessings to you are your loved ones,

Lisa @ Life with 4! said...

thanks for sharing this thought today.
my oldest is 13 and there are times i see behaviors that aren't ideal. it's a scary time but i pray each day for God to help me be the Mom that he needs. And each day God provides me wisdom and encouragement through His word.

i love the idea of growing roots today so that later they can spread their wings.

have a wonderful weekend!

Donna~One Simple Country Girl said...

I am right there with ya on the parenting thing. I have a 16 year old son who thinks he knows everything and Mom is just some dumb old lady who knows nothing. I guess everyone goes thru this. One thing I know is that it sure isn't much fun! Whatever happened to our sweet babies that loved it when we hugged, kissed and tickled them? Parenting is so hard and I guess we just do the best we can day by day. Hang in there sweetie, and just love your little girl. She will come back around. I've seen this first hand with my youngest brother. So there is hope for us and our teens! Hope you have a wonderful weekend!

Jo-Anne said...

All will be well.
I can honestly say that now that I am on my fourth teenager. I have found that THEY don't always know how to feel or act because what they are feeling is new to them as well. Being honest with her will be the key. Hang in are a great mommy. :)

VeeV said...

In my "expert" opinion (I have no kids) I believe that the foundation is made (or screwed up) within the first 5 years of a child's life.

I'll bet you've made a strong foundation.... it's just that at the moment you are experiencing a few ripples.......

then in a while.... the roof (gray matter) will go into place....

and the foundation will settle...


Bia, from Brazil said...

It´s the same in each and every home of the so called civilized world. Different in tribes. We should have sticked to that way of living.